Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Ruffled

I think it's a juvenile pigeon or something, he didn't look to well. I was able to get super close for the photo, and he/she just stared, then when I left he hopped away underneath a car.
Allow me this post to just vent. I feel as scraggly and bedraggled as this little guy I found this morning. So let me start: I love my life. I really do; I have 2 adorable dogs, I still get to live with my parents (yes that's a good thing, I mean, free rent?!), I have Doom and I love school, I have a job where I'm not standing behind a register or serving people food (which I've heard is a form of painful, minimum-wage torture) and I'm slowly creeping towards my goal of getting into veterinary school. But let's face it, I can't be Miss Sunshine all the time. All the crappy things in life have a way of catching up to me sometimes and making me want to just lay down and give up.
I guess this all boils down to me adapting to working and school, as well as planning out my future. At the moment, I'm on the fence about whether I should take another year before applying to vet school, or whether I should go full-steam ahead and apply in a year's time. I'm worried about my GPA. I'm worried about money. And at the same time, I'm trying to keep up with this class, without being able to just relax during the weekends. 7am-5pm is a tough shift, I've learned. It leaves no time in the mornings and little time at night. And so what, you may ask. So what if you don't get to lay around like a potato during the weekends? Well, it's more than that. I'm having art withdrawals! I don't want my art to be lost in a black hole. I don't want to give up on my calendar project. And I'm always torn between spending time with Doom, spending time with my doggies, spending time with my family, spending time with my friends, or giving myself some "me-time"... and with all of these things pulling me in different directions, I often just go hide in my room and do absolutely nothing. I feel... sad, unable to pinpoint an exact cause. I feel depressed. I eat too much, I feel sick-ish, all I want to do is sleep. I'm unable to concentrate. Waa, waa, waa, you get the idea.
I'm sure the past couple weeks is just a dark cloud spoiling my blue skies, it'll pass, but right now, I'm feeling crappy.
And thus I shall conclude this vent. I hope everything turned out okay for the scraggly bird.

1 comment:

  1. I know how you feel. I'm super tired all the time right now it seems like and I think it's because of stress. Doesn't help that my roommates argue with each other NON FREAKING STOP which makes me tense.

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