Thursday, May 9, 2013

WHY I love (and why you shouldn't make assumptions)

The other day at school, one of my friends ran into an old high school buddy of hers. They stood chatting for several minutes, while I half-heartedly listened. At first they talked about the normal stuff, 'Oh, I haven't seen you in forever!' and such, then their topic shifted to what everyone else from their high school was doing, 'Do you still hang out with blahblahblah?' and slowly, slowly, they began a rant on everyone who was getting married and having babies and such.
Well, they seemed to feed off each others similar anti-marriage sentiments, and it quickly escalated. Basically, this quick high-school reunion became a full on TIRADE against girls who get married young, while their still in college. And I'm just standing there, looking around, slowly realizing that--hey, wtf? I've got a ring on my finger here! Of course, I don't say anything. I just stood there, looking at the trees, until finally my friend must've realized who was standing next to her. "Oh, except for Bewildermunster, she's getting married but she's got her shit together!"
As if that was alright, as if that fixed it. Well, I didn't say anything then and I'm not going to, but it irked me. The more I thought about it, the more it bugged me. Like a rock in my shoe that just hurts worse when I reach down to adjust my shoe.
I'm tired of being the 'exception'. I don't want to be an anomaly. I hate broad generalizations, I hate narrow-mindedness, I hate shallow people, I hate judgmental people, I hate people who have to constantly be surrounded by drama.
I'm getting married this summer, I'm 21 years old. This is my life, my journey, and I have chosen who I want to share that journey with. We are young, but this life is short, just a wink of time in the universe.
One of my other friends, Chickadee, has been with her boyfriend for longer than Doom and I have been together, and she's always talking about how great it is that we're getting married, she's always looking up cute wedding things and all that crap, she's entirely romantic and cheesy and blah blah blah, but when I ask when she's getting married she dismisses it right away. She's so worried about the future, so worried about what others think, so worried about the fact that she's living in her mothers house and she's gonna graduate with debt... She's too worried about things that I find to be trivial.
I'm not saying one should just through all caution to the wind when it comes to marriage and relationships, but one thing is for sure: Don't pay any mind to what other people think.
Another friend that I knew back when I first started talking to Doom freaked out when Doom and I started dating. I'm sure there were underlying problems in the relationship, but her inability to accept my happiness led to the dissolution of our relationship. She basically asked me to choose, her or Doom, and I chose Doom.
To each his own
My group of friends seem to think Doom and I are perfect, they think we have sex like rabbits and feed each other cake and buy each other cute things and never fight and have the exact same interests. Of course, that's horse shit. We have our ups and downs. The reason we're getting married isn't because we have everything worked out, it isn't because we have this grand scheme, this master plan for our lives. I don't know where we'll be in 10, 20, 30, 40 years!

All I know is that I want to be with him. I cannot ensure this, but we sure can try. And we're both willing. And that, I think, is the most important thing.


  1. I do think its pretty young to get married. But that doesn't mean anything. You may be destined to change as you get older and not want to be together or you may have just found your soulmate earlier than most people do. All you can do is not rush into things and after a lot of thought hope for the best. And you guys have been together a couple years I think so I'd call that not rushing. :) Though you could have given me more time before the wedding to save up!! >:)

    1. OH definitely, I know I'm young but you can also look at it this way: Doom is 23!
      And I'm not so sure I believe in soulmates ;) but I do think Doom and I have the ability to work things out and talk about things, which makes me more confident in the relationship.
      LOL! I know we kinda jumped into the whole wedding thing BUT I wanted to get married before next year so we can finish up the whole name change business for applications and stuff.